I Can't Lose You
by Mikigotagun
Summary: It takes a tragedy for Ed to figure out his feelings for Winry.


Disclaimer: I do not own FMA but I wish I did.

AN: Like I said I'm a hopeless romantic at heart and if it takes a tragedy to get someone to let their feelings out then that's my kind of story.

I Can't loose you

It was a warm spring day when Winry stepped off the train. Edward had called her a couple of days earlier and told her his right arm had been sticking. So she had to decided to surprise Al and him and do some maintenance on him. She knew trying to tie him down to do maintenance was going to be hard because he was never the type to sit in one place to long. He liked to keep moving he told her once sitting around made him fidgety.

Mustang and his team were in hot on the trail of a out of control alchemist hell bent on bringing Central down. They had tracked him to an abandoned building next to the train station. He was putting up quite a fight.

"Sir he's not going to give up easily" Hawkeye said firing her gun into the building.

"I know so I guess I'll just have to level the place." Mustang said putting his glove on.

"Are you sure about this?" Havoc asked puffing on his cigarette.

"What choice do I have?" Mustang knew if thy didn't stop him now that next time he'd probably succeed in his mission.

"Alright" Everyone began to check around the building and make sure no civilians were around.

They scrambled around to keep people away from the scene. Winry thought if she went through the building she could cut a few blocks off her trip. So she entered the door and began to make her way through the dark building. It looked as if it had been vacant for sometime. So carrying her red toolbox over her shoulder that she grabbed onto tighter because the place was scary and she picked up her pace a little to get out soon.

Mustang's team came back and gave him a thumbs up that no one but the alchemist was in the building. He focused his flames on an old generator filled with gas. It would take the place up in one big explosion. He stretched his arm out in front of him and snapped sending flames shooting through the front of the building. His eyes widened when he saw her making her way to the front of the building inside "Nooo" But as the flames shot past her they blew her sideways into another room. There was nothing he could do and the building engulfed in flames and blew apart.

He ran forward and his team wondered what the hell he was doing as he started throwing pieces of rubble and frantically searching.

"Sir what are you doing?" Hawkeye asked confused.

As he threw pieces of rubble to the side "THERE WAS A GIRL IN THE BUILDING!" he yelled.

They all gasped as they joined in the search tearing off their jackets and making a line and began removing huge pieces of rubble out of one spot. That's when he spotted the lifeless hand and he panicked "OH MY GOD!" he began to pull rubble off faster "HELP ME! SHE'S OVER HERE!" Everyone rushed over to help pulling rubble off as she came into site.

Hawkeye gasped at the site of the red tool box and she slowly looked at Mustang "Sir" she bent down and moved the hair away from the girls face and panic ran through her body "I-It's Winry sir"

"Noooo" Mustang's eyes widened.

Hawkeye felt for a pulse then stood up "She's alive but barely."

Mustang scooped her up in his arms as they ran to the car "HOSPITAL NOW!" He yelled to Hawkeye as she jumped into the drivers seat. Mustang had questions running through his mind why the hell was she here? Did I kill her? Where the hell is Fullmetal and Al? I have to find them.

When they reached the hospital he ran with her limp body in his arms through the doors "HELP SOMEBODY!" Doctors and nurses came running "A building collapsed on her" He panicked "HELP HER!" he gave her to the hospital staff and then fell against the wall as he put his hands to his head.

Hawkeye walked over to him "Sir you didn't know she was in there."

He snapped "That doesn't matter I should have made completely sure no one was in there" He turned to her "Where's Fullmetal at? We need to get him here now.

He looked at his team and shouted "SOMEONE FIND HIM NOW!" they all scrambled around and ran out the doors. Hawkeye's head went down "Yes Sir" she said softly as she watched Mustang come completely unglued. She couldn't make this any easier as he began pacing the floor.

Edward and Al were in a small town helping the citizens overcome a military control problem. The military was trying to suppress the citizens and Edward was trying to help the citizens have a voice to the military. He was sitting down with the head guy of the operation when Havoc and Al walked in.

"Edward you and Al are needed back at Central immediately" Havoc told him.

Edward being annoyed thinking Mustang was trying to pull him out "What the hell do you mean? I almost got this settled I can't leave now."

Al walked over to him "Brother" he said softly "We need to go now." Havoc had filled Al in on what had happened.

"NO! I'm not going anywhere Al!" Edward argued.

"BROTHER" Al yelled annoyed that he wasn't listening "It's Winry" He said softly.

Edward got annoyed again "What's that idiot done now?" He said sarcastically.

"She's in the hospital a building collapsed on her ED!" Al snapped as he turned and walked out.

"Wh- wh- What?" Edward said in disbelief looking at Havoc "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?" he couldn't breath it felt like every bit of air had been sucked out of his body.

"We don't have much time Ed so come on" Havoc said walking out.

"Yeah" he said softly he couldn't think he was just following everyone numb to his emotions. As they boarded the train Havoc explained to him what had happened.

Edward sat on the train looking out the window as the memories rushed through him of when they were kids. He remembered all the birthdays they celebrated together, all the things he and Al had made her with alchemy. He remembered all the arguments he and Winry had gotten into, especially the last one when he busted up his arm really bad she had almost broken his head hitting him with that wrench.

As the train pulled into the station Edward was to impatient for it to come to a complete stop as he jumped off and with tears forming in his eyes he ran all the way to the hospital only stopping a few times to catch his breath then taking off again.

Al could barely keep up with him he knew Edward was worried as was he. He could tell Edward was pushing himself to the point of exhaustion.

Edward burst through the doors at the hospital and saw Mustang. He flew through the air and grabbed him by the front of the shirt knocking him into the wall "WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE YOU BASTARD!" He said pulling his arm back into a fist.

Mustang didn't fight back he looked at Edward with a look in his eyes that said 'go ahead beat the crap out of me' "I-I-I'm sorry Fullmetal" he said sadly "I don't even know where she came from. We had cleared the train station and surrounding buildings."

Edward got more pissed "DOES IT MATTER-" he stopped in mid sentence and his amber eyes widened. Train station? He remembered the conversation he and Winry had a couple of days before. He looked at the ground and let Mustang go "It's my fault" he said softly as he walked over to the wall and leaned against it.

"What do you mean Ed?" Al asked him confused.

Edward put his head down "I called her and told her I was having trouble with my arm." He put his hands to his face " I never thought she would be on the next train" he slid down the wall into a sitting position and raised his head "It's all my fault she came Al."

Al walked over and put his huge hand on his brothers shoulder "Ed you can't blame yourself."

Edward couldn't shake the feeling that this was his fault. What if she dies? Does Granny know? She'll never forgive me. I CAN'T LOSE YOU! I CAN'T LOSE YOU! He yelled as it echoed through his mind over and over again. 'It's my fault, It's my fault you never would have came if not for me' Don't die, Don't die. He couldn't think straight as he stood up it was like he wasn't even in his own body his emotions had over come every part of him.

"I-I want to see her" he said looking at everyone.

Just then the doctor walked by and explained to him she had a serious concussion and a broken leg. It was sheer luck that most of her lower body took the most damage. The way the rubble fell around her made a void that protected all her major organs and everything else. She was bruised and cut up but in time she would make a full recovery.

Edward breathed a little easier and he made the decision that Al need to go get Granny Pinako and he would stay with Winry. "Can I see her?" he asked the doctor.

"Sure" the doctor said telling him not to let the swelling and bruising startle him because it looked worse than it was.

Edward walked into the room and looked at her as she laid their almost lifeless. He couldn't believe if he just wouldn't have told her about his arm she would be safe at home right now.

He slowly walked over to her and put his hand on her bandaged head then leaned his forehead to hers "I'm so sorry Winry" His amber eyes filled with tears. My gosh what have I done? I always think about myself I never think of the consequences to the people around me. I feel so helpless some great alchemist I am when it really counts I can't do a damn thing. He lifted his head and pulled a chair up, taking his jacket off and throwing it over the back of the chair he sat down.

As he sat there he thought of what his life would be like if she wasn't in it. He had this feeling he couldn't explain it was like dread. To never see her smile again or smell the way her hair smelled after she washed it. To have her always nagging him about taking care of his automail. The way she concentrated while she worked on him and her touch. To never fell her touch again. It was more than he wanted to think about at that moment. Hawkeye walked in to check on him "Edward are you okay?" She put her hand on his shoulder "Do you want to come talk to us for a minute?"

"NO! I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to sit here till she wakes up." He said putting his head down as his hair fell forward "I will sit here forever if that's how long it takes."

"Alright" Hawkeye knew Edward was devastated maybe he would finally figure out that he actually loved her. Hawkeye knew he did but Edward always pushed those feelings down. She thought maybe he just didn't have time to feel those things with trying to get their bodies back and all. "Edward she'll be okay."

"Yeah" he looked at Hawkeye but what if she's not? What am I going to do? I feel like my heart has been ripped out just looking at her. If I could trade places with her at this moment I would do it.

After Hawkeye left Edward got up and walked over to the bed. He laid down in it next to her and put his left arm behind her head as he laid face to cheek with her. He moved his face slowly towards hers and kissed her cheek then he began to talk to her. "Winry remember when we used to sleep together as kids and Al would steal all the covers? Remember the time Den ate Al's birthday cake? As he continued he started to miss her smile and her voice "Come on Winry give me a sign your in there?" He asked as he continued to talk then as it got later he dozed off.

Winry opened her eyes slowly and looked around she noticed Edwards jacket on the chair. Edwards here? Where is he? She began to scan the room with her eyes. She felt someone next to her so she slightly turned her head to see him sleeping next to her. She tried to say his name but it hurt to bad to try to talk. Just having him there made her feel better she turned her head to face him and it hurt so bad but she wanted to look at him. He looked so peaceful laying there but she couldn't keep her eyes open any longer so she went back to sleep.

Edward woke up the next morning and noticed her head was turned towards his face. That's a good sign he thought but I wasn't awake when she woke up 'I'M SUCH AN IDIOT! He laid there and looked at every bruise and cut on her face and memorized them. He must have laid there for hours and he waited for her to open her eyes but she didn't. Please open your eyes, don't die I can't live without you. Your part of me, I'll go insane, I'll kill Mustang, My heart is broken I'm nothing without you, Who else would push me if you didn't? You're the only one that understands me. All these things were rushing through his mind as he broke down into a full meltdown. He cried so hard laying there he had only cried like that when his mother died. He wiped the tears from his face and leaned over to her ear as he was cheek to cheek with her he came to one conclusion as he buried his face in her hair "You can't die….Because…because I love you" he whispered softly in her ear.

Her eyes opened slowly and she felt his cheek on hers and the tears "I….love you….too..Ed…ward."

He leaned back slowly and looked at her "Your not leaving me" He commanded as he kissed her forehead and moved her hair out of her face "I love you so much and I'm sorry this happened to you because of me."

"If it hadn't who knows….how long it would….have taken you to ….tell me that." she smiled a slight smile.

He shook his head "Gear head" He said softly.

"Al….chemy Fre…ak" she whispered as she closed her eyes again and he leaned down and kissed her swollen bruised lips.

He laid back in a sitting position with his back to the wall as she laid her head up against his chest "I promise I will never let anything happen to you again." he held her as she fell back to sleep.

Edward never left her side and she was wondering if he was getting anxious to leave the hospital. Over the past week they had some very intimate moments and she had enjoyed it and she wondered if this was going to change anything. She knew he had to go take care of the man they called father and the homunculi. During the last week things had changed and they all had to make there move now.

Edward thought she was looking much better and he hated to leave her because after this he couldn't see his life without her in it.

He walked over to the bed and leaned down and kissed her "Go home with Granny" he looked at Pinako then back to Winry "When this is over I'll be home" he smiled as he ran his hand through her hair "Okay."

She smiled and nodded "Mmm hmm."

He leaned down by her ear "I love you" He whispered as he leaned back and ran his hand down her cheek "I'm sorry it took me so long to figure that out. I almost lost you and I wouldn't been able to tell you."

"I love you too and come home soon "She smiled a soft smile as he walked to the door.

" I will" he turned and Al followed him but not before turning around.

"Bye Winry" Al waved as he turned to the nurse "Take care of her or my brother will lose it." He chuckled then walked out to catch up with Edward.


End file.
